Fusion

I share this thing with nm that no one else will understand.

On a physical level, he's patient with me and he knows how to give me space and respect, and the time for me to let me venture (haha)at my own pace. No force, nothing pressurizing, just very mutual. Four years of sharing fluids don't just go to waste like that. nm is a creature of habit, and therefore, same for the girlfriend. Synchronising is an understatement, knowing how each other respond just brings it to the next level. Who says sex gets boring after awhile? Then you probably haven't have enough exposure to internet, magazines rental shops and Condomaniacs. Or the brains just not working hard enough. Or the hormones are changing into reverse gears. Or something else.

On a social level, we don't see eye to eye with stuff our friends do. But we are on the same social platform and there is this unspoken understanding between us and our friends. We keep our side of the street clean. Although drama is just across the road, we share critics gossips and sentiments like an old couple. When the drama sweeps its way to our side of the street, it's up to us on how to clean up the mess, how long it'll take and how to go about it. The people on the other side of the road can't hear our whisperings. They don't know and it's okay. At least we know the same people. Doesn't feel like I'm on Venus and he's from Mars. That maybe we are just living on Earth with the tyrant and psychopath of a f****r.

On a financial level, okay this is a whole new dynamic. But yes I admitted we had an argument once about footing the cab fare and stuff but looking back, seemed rather couple-ish to discuss/argue/bicker about money eh. As if all grown up and financially indepedent. But so not we are/were. We dont do extravagant things together, we make plans, come up with a budget, starve/work and save to do that one thing special together. It's fucking sweet. Like we fucking earn this goddamn son of a bitch thing together. Together.

On an emotional level, there are just the both of us in this whole damn fucking shite alone. I take pride in the fact that we depend on each other solely on issues un-mentionable here. Families, educations, past-flings/dates, peer pressure. I dont know how, but his patience never waver, and his tone so calm and reasons so sane he can talk me out of something and put stupid ideas in my head that look brilliant, and how he could put himself in my shoes and feel/think for me.

I love the fact that we are black and yellow, it's like some sort of danger warning color combi? We are as different as North and South Poles, we speak different languages, our strengths, a safety net and flaws, some sort of endearment, they complement each other, and how to say? Complete us.

Our differences from each other, and difference from everyone else, make us unique.

No title

"it is darkest before dawn."

I could use this to try to pyscho myself each time something bad happens that it's not going to last. That was Leon's advice. But (L)eon, I think I had hoped too much.

My heart feels like a ton of crumpled rock pieces. I haven't really like really really felt this way in a long time. Back to the (o)ld self. Maybe happiness wasn't what God have in mind for me. I can't even explain it, because to explain, I need to think about the issue, reflect about it and weigh the consequences and evaluate the situation. Which of course, is too much for me, my little weathered heart to handle anymore.

Not a(n)ymore please.

Results out on Friday. It's not lik(e) how it used to be, anxiety, tears of anxiety, tears of desperation and helplessness, restlessness and panick written all over me. Now it's just a sense of foreboding that is annoying the shite outta me. I want to get rid of. I needed an assurance, given the situation back 3 years ago. Now, it has boiled down to just me and the liberty that comes with age.

I know alot of us would like to curl up in a feta(l) position in a corner and squeeze their eyes really tight and wait til the storm is over. But I rather get up, face the world, pretend that nothing happened and let the day runs its course without your dark cloud hindering. Beats facing the darkness I see in my head and conjuring up all the negativit(y) I can come up with.


Yes.



"want to swim away but don't know how
sometimes it feels just like i'm falling in the ocean
let the waves up take me down
let the hurricane set in motion
let the rain of what i feel right now...come down
let the rain come down

where is the coastguard
i keep looking each direction
for a spotlight, give me something
i need something for protection
maybe flotsam junk will do just fine
the jets, i'm sunk, i'm left behind
i'm treading for my life believe me
how can i keep up this breathing

not knowing how to think
i scream aloud, begin to sink
my legs and arms are broken down
with envy for the solid ground
i'm reaching for the life within me
how can one man stop his ending
i thought of just your face
relaxed, and floated into space"

Old Man Turns Twenty

Four days ago on Monday the Boy turns twenty.

Wow.

I wowed about him growing old and almost hitting the 21 soon.

I wowed about how this has made me look back and realised that I've wished him ever since we were 17 (or issit 16?)

I wowed at how we both had aged and grew together and how much had happened between the both of us and we both are still one piece each. And now a piece together, though I find us rather dysfunctional, hormoned-driven, happy and temperamental, loving yet independent (yes right?) couple.

I wowed because I know I will wish him Happy Birthday every year, even if we don't end up together, even if we ended up marrying someone else, even if we both leave Singapore and have our own different kids. I know he'll always be the treat if not the dessert if not the main course, and affair would be most likely.

I wowed because all these years I love him despite everything and love him more because each time I thought I lost him to my own folly he took me back and love me more, making us both feel like nothing is impossible to overcome. There are no walls too high or sea too deep or currents so strong we can't swim, whatever. Haw haw.

I wowed because I remembered surprising him once at Wisma Atria's Quiksilver shop when I purhcased him a top for his birthday and he turned back with a knowing smile and a look that says i-know-there's-something-up-your-sleeve. I remember so many other saddening and happy incidents too.

I wowed at us, at how we started in the good old days, us in boardshorts (you still wear them out) and roxy and quiksilver tees and reeking of young teenage-ness and morphing into what we both are now.

I wowed at then when we were only schoolkids, and you smsed me once when you were having a biology test during ConCamp, asking me about female's period cycle and what-nots. I remembered me helping you cheat that test. I remembered you sneaking out of con camp and me out of geog rememdial to strip the schoolkids label to don the role of skanky and scandalous in movie theatres.

I wowed at how now we are working and meeting up is no longer like how it used to be in the past but we made it all worthwhile somehow, how it makes me feel funny in my chest thinking how we stepped out of school into the next world.

I wowed at how much you know about me and vice versa and how we spill our guts and hearts in the night, in each other arms and knowing vulnerabilty is no longer the fearful first thought but gratitude and love are what we both are to each other.

I wowed at everything we had and have, at all of these and I just wanna tell you how much I love you and I wish you a Happy Birthday and hopefully I can do so in the same role, til we discuss about grandkids's university admissions.

I wow at the thought of it.

I wowed at this mushy entry and at whatever that we both had bear our marks on.

I love you Boss.

Wow.

I like the salty smell of my Stinking Stockings

I think acting has done this guy alot of damage. He didn't look so baaaad in the latest 007 movie and just when I thought he does have the fugly-man sex appeal I think this picture says it all. Haw Haw. But we both are quite sad fuckers, we both have almost no eyebrows to boot. For that I stand by DC but his nose is disturbing.

Regina my (ex-Emirate wealthy by flying but now just broke and horny) colleague at Shang mentioned that scrubbing your eyebrows when you are cleansing your face works. The brows will grow. But I've no idea man, normally when I wash my face it's inclusive of my non-existant brows, so HOW NOW BROWN COW does anyone have any brilliant idea to help me grow bush on my eyebrows? Pretty pleasee. Spells are welcome too. Haw Haw. Reggie has the same prob too, so you would see the both of us drawing eyebrows in the changing room and trying to hide my (how to hide?) breasts from her clutching hands. She wants to see my tits. Honestly, I'm speechless and bit freaked out. But we both have similar fetish though HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! Shang-system works like a school, but that would be reserved for days to discuss when I have nothing to blog about.

Oh yes anyone read trent and about the article of MJ having serious thoughts of converting to Muslim. I found that rather amusing, not cos of the religion but the doubtful fact that he actually has a religion to convert out of. Hahaha. Personally, I find it rather offending. If he has enough faith in God he probably wont have such a bad rep getting into trouble with the law and converting doesnt show much of a Christian he is to me (not that I am any sort better to judge) and how's that going to make him a better Muslim? It's not like subcribing to cable or broadband. So if your Starhub cable isn't working as well and you want to switch to Singtel Broadband, it's rather trivial and probably better. But religion( in my most ignorant state of mind) doesnt seem to work that way. But there again my parents were Buddhists before they converted to Christians after me.

So I don't really know what I am talking about now.

By the way, there was once I was working at the Blu Bar at Shang as a barmaid (is there any way to better describe my job?) there was a couple, a really youthful looking lady in her fiftes who looks like she is barely 35 and her husband with his head wrapped up in Turban, who is younger than her. He is the Chief Pilot and trainer at SIA I think. And they invited the whole bar crew to their house for supper after work once. YES, I KNOW. Alot of things went through my head when my colleague threw me this load of gossip. But I wished I was working there then so I can make friends with her and make her spill her secret to her beauty and check out her taitai house.

You have no idea how envious I get when I see these interracial couples who made it to marriage. I let myself think it's impossible, but looking at them you wont be able to tell if they had religious or racial probblems when getting married and I wonder how was it like on their wedding day. Oh wells. I miss Him alot now, his dad isn't making our lives any easier but there is nothing we can do about it. So if your parents are the supportive kind, please dont rub salt in my wound. ): Anyway I got this half-price deal at Video EZ anyone who doesn't have a social life wants to rent anything please contact me. Hahahahaha. I'm kidding. About the no life thing. But VideoEZ should be thriving in business right? Sorry I lost the point I was trying to say. But personally I thought it was brilliant that I got the deal! Anyone else who received the offer on sms too? Anyway I rented two for the price of one!!! (obviously) but seriously getting a cheap deal nowadays cheers me up no end. I'm damn housewife and ahsoh now right, except the idea doesnt really fit anytime soon. I plan to rent as much as I can before 11Feb, so guys, you know if you have ignored me for awhile and wants to watch vids you know who to call and buy coffee for now. Just dont be an ass and run away with the vids.

(pause)

Dont think anyone would actually rent from me, but please join the ahsoh gang!

(pause)

Guess who!

Just Another Day

Add this to my new series of unfortunate events, I have just lost a new almost done entry. And I'm re-typing it all again.

Last two weeks the unforgiving and unexpecting weather-changes and the breaking of Our regular-meetings schedule have rendered me wasted and hoarse in the throat praying to God for leniency for whatever misdeeds I had committed in 2006, except you know whats. It had left me wishing for the familiar good weathers and Our Sunday Dates. ^*$#^$*%$.

Last Thursday, I was on my way to Borders after work and it started to pour like a nasty Biotch and I was forced to take temporary shelter at the sidewalk at a construction site. Ok, here's the story, three unfeeling ladies/monsters walked past me with umbrellas without offering to walk me to FJ Bens or Orchard Hotel which was 5 metres and 50 metres away respectively. One of them was a maid and she got the cheeks to stare at me. I would have gnaw her eyes out with my teeth if I could. Fuckers.

How could anyone not be pissed especially when the monsters left me stranded alongside with some Bangla workers checking out my white-tee-turning-transparent and my blue strippy bra getting visible with every minute. So to end their cheap entertainment I braved the rain barefooted to Orchard Hotel (for no reason they were cheering me on from behind, I don't understand their culture but I know they always like to be part of a scene. If you watch news when there's a fight or fire somewhere the screen is always filled out with alot of banglas trying to see what's going on. but I don't need spectators and I didn't think it was funny nor do I think I'm some kind of show. Thank you very much.)

Ironically, when I was trying to get to Palais Renaissance this rather cute guy offered to share his brolly with me and the drenched mademoiselle that I was was so touched by that small gesture I was thanking him profusely and if you looked closely my eyes were glistened with grateful tears. He must thought I was sick in the head or just extremely desperate. But he didn't know I was so tired at work I dozed off at the greeter stand and the supportive Bangla workers cheering me on when I was left stranded at the sidewalk. But God decided to drop me some help because my clumsiness is a pain in his neck and if I was to break down in public the damage would be worse and he would have to do more damage rescue to others who would be disturbed and traumatized by me. Poor Lauren must have prayed alot for herself when I used to break down on a regular basis. But I love you Lauren I'll buy you lotsa handbags when I strike rich when I make a niche for myself in my future career to make up for the missed OC episodes.

But thank God again I saw the Other Half later in the evening and the dark cloud above my head just dissipated immediately. (:

---

I've been working my ass off back to back six days a week to save as much as I can to buy Nafis a decent wallet for his 20th birthday. I've got a very trustable Financial Controller Miss Lauren Choy Hui Wen she's been doing a great job pyschoing me to stop cabbing and calculating how much I can afford to spend and persuading me to pamper myself with some shopping.

Oh and today I fell down at the Holland Village Cold Storage back stairs. I was looking up at the sky and the next thing I knew I was facing the ground with my face flat and on all fours. My knees huuuuuurt like a fuuuuuucccccccking BIOOOOOOTCH. TAMADE CHAOCHEEBYE KANENAA. But no one saw me fall and I was kinda sad because no one saw and helped me and I am still feeling unwell and Nafis wasn't there to pick me up. Sobsssssssssss.

That's all for now for YokeMay's series of unfortunate events.

Visa Assembly Line

Today is MLK Jr Day!

Today is Martin Luther King Junior Day! I love one of his quote,

"I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal." I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slaveowners will be able to sit down together at a table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice. I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today."

I can so relate to it. You have no idea. I just realised that my Mother has really simply standards for my husband-to-be that is he is to be a Chinese non-smoker.

(pause)

What can I say? There is nothing I can say regarding this issue, right?

Yo mama's cooking method

I've came up with a new method to boil eggs and it is a less likely way that you would go wrong.
I had been eating eggs for the past two days and
the shortest, least hassle way is to boil them in your hot water dispenser.

I put two eggs inside,
top up the water til it is full so it automatically switch to boiling mode.

Just before the water is completely boiled,
remove the eggs,
crack them and serve with soy sauce and pepper and

make yourself a cuppa new tea for being so innovative.

When you blog less

Random

I'm bit disturbed. Lauren Choy thinks that my life is an open book and it's a tragedy romance. I think she thinks that way is cos my life is an open book to her and she is not spared from my romance too.

(pause)

But hey I think I'm a satirist!

Anyway work is rather tiring for my poor size three feet, other than that 8 hours a day is pretty much fine for me. Tips at Valley Wing are really encouraging especially when the whole place feels like some kinda ice palace. But I miss my friends at Horizon Club and I would hope to be transferred back no matter what. Too bad the son of the bitches new managers are just pathetic at doing the roster. Like fucking pathetic.

(pause)

But last week this guest called me AUNTY. CCB. KAOBEI LARR. He was talking to his daughter and he referred to me as AUNTY. "Shall we ask aunty if your hair looks better tied up or let down? Shall we ask aunty?"

Nerves.

The Other Half's birthday is around the corner. I'm panicking cos I'm worried I would have no time to save up for his present. Or what if he isn't happy with what he got? Wallet is the only thing I can think of since his ripcurl is old and blackened now. I think I should wire my money to Lauren in case I spend them. Shall ask her when the sum grows bigger. 

But I'm abit sad because saving up is such a tiring and tormenting thing to do. It's sadistic. I think money should be spent quickly. Saving is when you get married and your husband's savings become your disposable cash. HAHAHAA.

(think about it)

Oh my dear friends, I am kidding. I swear.

profit and loss 2006

Time to sum up last year's events, happiness and sorrows.

1. This year I was a swinging single, I was happy with the liberty I owned and always free to meet up my friends. The past years had taught me to appreciate my friends more and now then that I was single I make sure that I meet up with my beloved friends to let them know I'm still around and I'm grateful for them. I love my friends. (:

2. I got attached again and I'm grateful and completely overwhelmed and taken back because I had literally lived for that day to arrived since gaudknowswhen and I felt like I had fought a long battle with everyone who was/is against it and fought a battle within myself with the uncertainties that lay ahead. Uncertainty is an understatement. Kinda felt like alot of things were at stakes.

3. Struggled with Alevels and re-prioritised my goals. Reflected on my strengths and weaknesses, planning what I want to do in the future and alot of things came into light and alot into the dark too.

4. Made some new friends and lost a friend or two.

5. Working at Shang and it was an experience which had taught me how to cover your own ass and not depend on anyone. Work with colleagues who are as old as my mom and granny and listening to them talk about their kids my age. Very weird and uncomfortable moment when they would lament about their kids who only know how to ask for allowance.

6. Done with Alevels. Only felt like any other school day. Regrets and rejuvenation mingled with a mixed longing taste in my mouth.

7. Became a blogwhore.

8. Gained weight. Nafis was trying to get around it by telling me to exercise abit. Hahahaha.

9. First time to Zouk. Hahah I think I'm damn suah gu and hilarious and embarrassed.

10. Our 4th year anniversary.

Give and take, I felt like I've growned up a bit, not so wise maybe, but somewhat jaded and learned. Even though I've stop attending church I never stop believing in God so I would like to thank God for this year and all 19 years of blessings and grace and protection and all that he has given to me and took away from me.

A very loved and lucky year for me too.

Last Week

Last Wed saw us at Mambo with our respective friends and him getting kinda high outside. I was out of the club at 1 plus cos it was fucking packed and I was getting pissed with the unmoving crowd so I got out of the place with Vick and Monique. It rained and he came out looking goofy and I was like oh no it's my turn to babysit him tonight.

It wasn't the babysitting that was hard. But the stuff he said which got me kinda emotional because even though he was high I know he meant it when he said the things he promised me and all the things he is doing for me and a peck on my lips with each word he said was like a promise on top of another. I can't really describe it but it was another side of him which griped me hard. It was hard because I wish I could dive under his arms and tell him I wanna stay good and true to him but I had to hold my tongue and emotions because I know he needed me more then. I was too busy grinning and touched that I just want him to continue talking too hahaha.

Hopefully we arent taking turns getting drunk, last two weeks ago he babysat me but even though I can't really remember much I know he was is there all along looking out for me. (:

Happy Anniversary!!!!

Happy 4th-Year Anniversary to myself and Nafis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know we kinda cheated the length of the relationship because it was kinda on and off but we never stop seeing each other and I believe even though there were other parties involved we didn't stop loving each other and this time I believe there shouldn't be anymore on and off sort of problem. Tsk.

Yesterday we had dinner at Coastes which doesn't have great service and mostly bungs working there. Nafis was bit sensitive to bungs hahaa plus the lousy service you cant help it and the bung was taking our order and she sounded so zzzz. I wanted to yell at her HEY TODAY IS OUR ANNIVERSARY SO WOULD YOU PLEASE SHOW SOME FACE. THANKS. Sorry for being smug about it, I can't help it. Haha. But it started raining we cant even walk out for a smoke neither a walk so we played board games. They should be called boredgames. Anyway it was lousy because the Other Half was having a great time thrashing me in chess and chinese chess. You should see his face grinning already before the game ended. I hate boardgames. I remembered him thrashing me at Uno, we went to Changi Airport and we were just hanging around and playing cards and I got thrashed. It was about 4 years ago minus one day or two from today. How time flies. We were only sec 3 kids. KIDS. Wearing OBS shirt and boardshorts. Hahaha. I shall wear them out one of these days to relive the moments. Only kidding.

We walked in the rain and into this massive carpark place to find that the bus service has stopped fo the day and we were walking back to Shang when we saw two guys in black vests and these rangers so kindly sent us to Harbour Front!!!!!!!! Nafis's eyes were like sparkling and his cheeks swelled up a bit trying not to laugh. I couldn't help it I was grinning like mad and smiling and looking around in the car and checking out His expressions Hahaha. Damn suah gu lar me.

Today we had ourselves to ourselves. Which was just fan-fucking-tastic and absolutely yummy and great to spend the Special Day.

---

Anyway I spent Christmas and its eve at Shang working. Tiring it was but the guests weren't so bad and the crew were always great working with in the morning so I don't mind getting up at 445 everyday. Eve of eve of Xmas I worked 7 to 2 and 4 to 9 which was uber crazy and I was way fucking shagged. But they were short of staff and if I plan to do what I planned it's good to show them I'm hardworking and reliable eh. Plus they give me work which is cash and it's good cos it's extra cash from the pocket money I get. Hahahaahahaa. But my money get used up fast so saving up is a good plan after I'm done with 2006. Probably wont be so bad if Lauren Choy Hui Hui was around to help me save on cab fares she's good at pyschoing me to bus home and less work cos I'll have her to go out with too! Hurry back okay woman!

Erm

I was trying to look into my blog archives but I don't know how. Anyhoos, I'm at Donnas now, we watched Shrek and Hitch. Will Smith always get the smooth-groove roles aye. Plus I'm like feeding the mosquitoes here. Zzz

I haven't blogged in the longest time. Work is a bitch and I swear it's like army. You only think when they tell you and you only move when they say so. You get fuckecd when your supervisor tells you to do this and your manager fuck you up again for not doing that. And when you try to make things easier they tell you to follow the rules and you have so many heads above you it's frustrating when everyone got their own lousy ways of doing things and you know sometimes you got the best idea. Tsk.

Work is boring and blood sucking. Especially when you have to be on your heels(shoes) all the time for 8 fucking hours straight. I've been doing greeter for the past two weeks, definitely less tedious than waitressing but it's alot more shite like remembering the guests' names, their room number, trying not to ask for their room number when they are coming up to the Horizon Club for breakfast or cocktail buffets. You do frigging math for the stock count, you do the daily report, you do the waitressing when you are alone at the lounge when everyone else are at the breakfast area cleaning up together. Sad and lonesome job I HATE!!! Eeeks. Anyway I shouldn't complain because it's good to have income and I doubt I'm any better at office work when I'll just doze off at the desk.

Anyway, time for daily report. I ended work at 3 and I only left Shang at 5 plus after I went to get my uniform altered (the dress was sweeping the ground for weeks) ended up switching to another set. Now the slit is not at the side of my thigh but at the front of my left thigh. Much MuUUUch easier to walk in it and the slit isn't very high up either. We're to look smart not sleazy the Other Half thought I'm going to "skimpify" the uniform. No worries Baby! 

So anyway, I just realised one of my colleague is actually a MOM. Ok, a MILF to be exact. Please people don't tell you don't know what a MILF is if you but if you don't, you better find out now. She looks like she's 22 but actual fact she's 28 and she has two kids!!!!!!!!! Omg and she looks like she's 22 you know!!!! I don't know how she does it but she is incredible and she looks even younger than some of the 25s or 22s I swear. Two kids I really wouldn't believe it especially last week when she was flirting with some guy from other department. 

Oh God I  just want to lament about the unfairness of the world why is she still so youthful and slim and I'm not even ever pregnant and I've a bigger hip and waist and tummy and shorter thicker legs. How shiteholed is that may I ask excuse me God I deserve some blessings too right. I'll be damned if I have a kid in the future and have even thicker shorter veinier legs, and a more gigantic waist and hips. I'll be damned I repeat.

Anyway after work I had to buy eye shadow because small eyes like mine don't deserve eyeshadows you just look worse and I bought a cheap one just for work. Making up shouldn't be a chore, but it is now. It's like face painting except vainer. You made up a face that you want to show the world, lipstick to make you smile more and eyeliner to make it dramatic and blusher to make you look pink in the health. Which is all bullshite to me after a while because on some days I would like it very much to go without a trace of powder on my face and just ponytail my hair.

Anyway my Christmas wish this year is to wish that I'll never have to wish to lose weight on every festive seasons because finally I don't need to anymore. Hahahhaha. 

Met my granny in the bus two days back, was she going to go to the wet market? Not sure. Ok anyway I was very overwhelmed when I saw her. I've not visited her for months, more than 3 or 4 months I bet and I overwhelmed with guilty and shame because she and all my relatives doted on me all along for being the eldest daughter of the eldest daughter. And I didn't even bother to visit her. And my poor granddaddy is handicapped after some diabetic illnesses that left his legs weak and decayed. You know seeing your granny makes you feel like a three year old girl all over again and you can ask for anything you want in the world and you have the whole world at your feet. I panicked for a while wondering what is to happen if either of they or both met with an accident and I'll never be able to see them and talk to them and joke and have them ask me about me and fuss over me anymore. I'll never be a good granddaughter even if i want to, not ever to repay back their love and kindness and unconditional attention. I'll be damned.

Got bit carried away with my thoughts.

Pictures!

Okay! Prom Pictures and some pictures from the racing night are up here!

and guess what sam i can't reply to u because im not a friend but ive added you but i dont know how to accept the request hahaha sorry i know im being a ditz here. this site is looking more and more like a friendster hahaha but for the artsy fartsy only heha and i'm an imposter hahhaa!

Woah!

Woahs. Serious Sam what a face lift! It's really cool now I bet you took pains getting this done so well. Maybe that's why for the past two days I can't log on? Mm..anyway let me update about yesterday's wasted night at Mambo.

Yeah actually there was no Mambo night what am I talking about. There was no Mambo, I got in at one thirty and I was there around twelve. Waved alot and heeyyyy-omg-it's-you alot and waiting for Nafis who was already high and having fun at phuture already. He said he would come out but he didn't and I was waiting miserably to get in and for him to come out to see the poor girlfriend at the queue.

When I got in, all I had was a few glasses of drinks. If I'm not wrong and about ten minutes of clearheaded-ness before the alcohol hit me. In the ten minutes I walked to meet Nafis, then Donna apeared and we danced like two morons and then Nafis came and I think I was on support already. Hahahaha seriously what a fucking Mambo night. I think an average person who drink on an empty stomach won't be so loser than me larr. The night was followed by puking, and talking to my Other Half about well, alot of things and alot of other silly things I bet. Poor Baby had to babysit me throughout I completely spoilt his night. I got some making up to do. I wonder how people get wasted on a regular basis because it's kinda tiring. And I would say I had the most tiring two weeks of work prom getting high racing getting bored getting drunk. I think I'm catching on with age.

Backtrackked to the queue we were getting bored and restless and guess who came and accompanied! It was SWONG. That silly girl is back from Australia and the first thing she did was crack a joke about can't help me look for Nafis in the club. Yeah you know the joke and she reminds me of the first few months in jc when she would make endless racist jokes. Vel brought me a drink and hahaha we were having a mini gathering for awhile. Sam sat with Sean when we got in zouk and Sam got tricked into drinking alot hahha too bad I was getting drunk myself to know anything hahha I would have laugh louder than the blasting speakers.

Then I remember Kamini was making alot of noise because I found her voice so familiar and resounding because she now looks like and sound exactly like one of my schoolmate call Allison who is a Chindian and Kamini looks like a Chindian though I don't know what mix she is. Now I realised why I kept saying she looks like someone. Oh wells. She's quite funny she said she can't see Nafis in the dark when Nabil and her found us (or me) wasted at the little openspace behind  and I wanted to ask her how was it possible she's hugging something invisible. I wanted to laugh at her because I don't know who's she trying to make fun of she's dating my boyfriend's brother man hahaha and that makes two of us with two banglas I just thought it's hilarious I don't know why too. Must be thinking through my drunken brains still.

After that was the ride home in their car and Nafis sending me straight up to home and kissing goodbye.

Mind Rest

Days passed rather quickly and before I could gather my thoughts. Another day has passed and something else crops up before I can settle down and type a decent entry. Everyone has slept and Nafis hasn't replied, which I suspect he is playing Dota now, Lauren is out at Chris's place so basically I have a couple of hours to myself now and I'm at a loss of what to do. Normally, thoughts flow like a river but now that I no longer attend school, my brain cells seem to have went along with the absence of school and I feel cut off from the world since I have no time to read news. Sad to say, I find news kinda draggy nowadays, or maybe cos I'm reading Herald Tribune and Wallstreet at work and my mind is on a constant sleep mode after greeting the guests and waitressing around.

Car Gang

Prom Day

It was fucking hectic. I had to rush to get my tailored dress. Which wasn't very nicely tailored. The woman didn't really do a great job but nevertheless I'm greatful and she's such a nice lady. Rushed to buy heels and a stupid bag which I would never ever carry it out again. Went to Next to do my hair and Yazid did a great job. But you know a hairstylist doesn do everything. He has his team of hairwashers, blowdryers and such and his job was just to tell me what's good on me and "design" my hair while the rest just do what they are told.

Prom was fun and boring (otherwise) except I got poked fun off by the MC (flyingfuckingdutchman) and I went beetred. Something about looking for a virgin and Sheryl kept pointing and then the whole table started to chant and point and Flying Dutchman came and I went NO!!!! I meant like NODON'tCALLME! And he went on on the fucking mic making fun of saying that even if I'm not a virgin there is no need to tell the world I could've pretended to be one. But there again. the whole ballroom would have thrown a fit if I was choosen.

Post prom was great. The part was held at Momo and the crowd was so fucking pack omg there was no room to dance. The ruggers got really drunk. Khairul was like passed out with Junhan and they all talked funny. Push was drunk and Jerome and I helped him out and all the way to Liang Court and though I was high, Push was the funny fucker making all the fucking indian accent shite and talking shite. He should get drunk all the time cos he's really funny when drunk but kinda zzz when sober. Hahahha. But don't worry, Push is a nice guy so I'm not implying he's boring or what. But just that there is a stark difference when he's drunk. Some normal guys on normal sober days would talk like him when he gets drunk. Hahhaa.

Shamus and I got our pictures taken by Lime Mag beause of our outfits and I credited the dress to Dorcas who designed it for me. Hehe. All along I was worried about how fucking fat I'm going to look in the pictures. Hopefully they will only choose a few and mine isn't choosen because my arms are too fat.

Oh well. The whole night was just fucking funny looking at these people and getting high. Kevin Ang (PE teacher) dyed his hair gold. I mean like what the fuck @Q^#^W#^$ i didn't even dye my hair man and I adore my black hair. He's such a kid he came for the post prom and he was like trying to flaunt his dancing skills. Oh wells whatever kelvin ang.

While waiting for cab this fucking sweden asshole, drunken swedish asshole came to us, Dorcas Darren Rod and I, and started to ramble about how fucked up Singaporeans are. Seriously, if he wasnt holding on to the fucking empty glass bottle I would just kick his nuts. Firstly, he's being patronizing, he got his guts from the liquor and secondly, I'm dying from lack of sleep and fustration for six am to come so that we can skip the midnight surcharge and there he was fucking our brains away with his theories.

Shall upload the pictures soon.